The Other NFC Hotness

I was born, raised, and reside right outside of Trenton, New Jersey. The Line of Demarcation between Eagles and Giants fans runs, roughly, right through Trenton, NJ. We get both the New York and Philly network affiliates on television. Our local papers act like the Eagles are the local team one day, the Giants the next. There are Eagles bars, there are Giants bars, and there are the ones that try and be the Switzerland of bars, taking the money of both sides and maintaining neutrality without regard to the moral ramifications of doing so.*

Giants fans think of themselves as classier than Eagles fans, that they're somehow superior for throwing their allegiance behind a team that has arguably had more historical success than the Eagles. One whose fan base isn't as universally vilified and reviled by the nation. A group who try and maintain the deranged passion of an Eagles fan, but maintain an air of civility and white-collar supremacy that the hardscrabble Philly faithful could never aspire to. Well, let me break it down for you, Giants fans:

- Your QB has the composure of a 14-year-old with raging hormones thrown into Delilah's on a Friday night.
- There are three kinds of football coaches: Those with brains, those with guts, and Tom Coughlin.
- You SHARE a stadium with the JETS. You can't even afford your own house.
- Philly fans are passionate, crazed, and belligerent, even when not in the friendly confines of the Delaware Valley. Why? Because we can back it up with knowledge or fists. Iggles fans don't know what the term 'fair weather' means, because the weather is never 'fair' unless you've got the ring.
- We've beaten you five straight times. Nice little run.
- DeSean
- LeSean
- Vick

Have fun out there. Remember, it's only a game and not a gridiron metaphor for your shortcomings as people. No metaphors are necessary for that.

* The Jets and their fans do not play a role in any of this. They are awful. I don't know many, and the ones I do disappear on Sunday to some mystical place that never sees the light of day. This is a matter about which questions should not be asked and the convenient status quo maintained. Any gunner foolish enough to pursue the truth should be forewarned that their actions are way out of bounds and may find themselves tripped up and taken out.